Sunday, March 8, 2009

Lexy's story

For those that don't know the story of how Lexy became a part of our family...

On July 8, 2004 we got a foster call for a 4 month old baby girl that needed a home. Her birthmom was in jail and the people that she left the baby with didn't want the responsibility. We weren't sure we wanted to take another little one as we already had Brooke who was 8 years old and Isaiah, a foster son, that was 11 months old. But we felt a definate pull to take this baby so we said yes.

That evening an SRS worker brought "Lexy" to our home. The SRS worker said that Lexy had been crying the entire day at the office and wasn't consoled with someone holding her. The worker said that she had made a doctor appt. for the next day because along with the constant crying (she didn't think this was normal) there was what she described as a "lacy rash" all over Lexy...we later found out that the "lacy rash" was just what Lexy's skin does when she gets upset and it still does this! Mike (Daddy) was the first one to pick Lexy up out of her carseat. Lexy instantly started crying and arching her back.

A few days later we found out that Lexy had been exposed to drugs inuetero and had been left in her carseat or crib by herself most of her short life, having very little attention or loving contact. The circumstances that she lived through made it hard for her to trust that anyone would meet her needs. Therefore she would need to learn that she would be taken care of and to trust before she could form an attachment to anyone. Lexy spent many hours of the day for the first couple of months in a front carrier next to Mommy's heart learning to be held and loved on. She had also learned to tune out all sounds around her making professionals question if she had a hearing deficit (she didn't).

From the age of 4 mos. to 14 mos. Lexy had visits once a month with her maternal birth grandfather whom gave updates to birthmom (his daughter) since she was still in jail. Lexy's birthfather decided that he could not provide a good life for Lexy and said that he would relinquish his rights so that we could adopt her when that time came. When Lexy was 14 mos. old her birthmom was released from jail and she asked that Lexy be returned to her. Lexy was made to go on weekly visits with her birthmom whom at that point was a stranger to her. The visits did not go well but were continued for 12 months. Lexy had many setbacks in her development in that time.

In Feb. 2006 (when Lexy was almost 2) a judge made the decision that Lexy's birthmom was unfit to parent Lexy due to birthmom's drug issues, lack of interaction/connection with Lexy at visits and her refusal to complete the tasks on her caseplan. At that time we were asked if we would adopt Lexy and make her a permanent part of our family...we were absolutely THRILLED!

In August 2007 (Lexy was 3 1/2 years old), Lexy became a very much loved part of our family. She had been our daughter for 3 years but we were finally her "legal" family!

Lexy is now 5 years old. She is our loving, caring, sweet, precious, funny daughter. She WAS able to learn to trust that we would always be here for her and take care of her and she is very much attached to our family. She is SO loved and cherished by all those that know her!

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